Discussion Questions
1. On page 13 in “Empty Nest”, Susan tells her children to “Follow your heart.” After reading the book, how do you think that Susan followed that advice on her path from law school graduation through her decision to stay home with her children?
2. Think about Gloria’s experience during her high school reunion in the chapter “Walls” from pp. 17-18, are there other examples in the book where walls are drawn between two people because of success or lack thereof? Do you think those who belittled Gloria’s success have a perspective that can be brought into a more instructive discussion with regard to the role of both Wall Street and education in our society?
3. Susan writes
Where we begin is with the knowledge that I am just one of hundreds of thousands of children who were brought up with the same values and attitudes in the 1960s, ‘70s, and early ‘80s. I was just a normal kid from a big Irish family, with parents who were happily married, a mother who was home taking care of us for the most part and who later returned to work as a teacher, and a father who worked hard balancing corporate work and family responsibilities (49).
How is Susan’s upbringing at once both extremely average and also unique? How does her upbringing translate into how she raises her children?
4. How does Bill’s role play out in Susan’s decisions? How does his unwavering support compare with the lack of support from the federal government discussed in the chapter “Maternity Leave” from pp. 63-65?
5. The chapter “Free Advice” illustrates a problem that is even more exaggerated today. Unsolicited advice is around every corner—on the front of a hundred magazines, discussed on television talk shows, and has hundreds of dedicated websites. While Susan begins the book with advice to her children, she resents the critical advice of a stranger in a store. How does this juxtaposition make sense? Do you think advice is appropriate without personal knowledge of a person’s individual problem? How has advice become such a valuable and sellable commodity when it is so readily given away—by friends, relatives and strangers on the grocery line?
6. Discuss Susan’s response to her interview in the chapter “The Victim.” Do you think her reaction was the best possible course of action?
7. What do you think about the different pre-school philosophies described in the book? While there are certainly merits to each system, is there one system that works best?
8. How does Susan Whelan respond to the arguments made by Anne-Marie Slaughter and Sheryl Sandberg regarding work-life balance?
9. How does the ability to hire home assistance change the Whelan’s family life? How does Susan address the unique circumstances that allow her to hire help? Does she address how other families can handle children while all parents continue to work?
10. What do you think is the most important current issue that Susan raises in the book?
(Questions courtesy of the author.)