When in French: Love in a Second Language
Lauren Collins, 2016
Penguin Publishing
256 pp.
ISBN-13: 9781594206443
Summary
A language barrier is no match for love.
Lauren Collins discovered this firsthand when, in her early thirties, she moved to London and fell for a Frenchman named Olivier—a surprising turn of events for someone who didn’t have a passport until she was in college. But what does it mean to love someone in a second language?
Collins wonders, as her relationship with Olivier continues to grow entirely in English. Are there things she doesn’t understand about Olivier, having never spoken to him in his native tongue? Does "I love you" even mean the same thing as "je t’aime"?
When the couple, newly married, relocates to Francophone Geneva, Collins—fearful of one day becoming "a Borat of a mother" who doesn’t understand her own kids—decides to answer her questions for herself by learning French.
When in French is a laugh-out-loud funny and surprising memoir about the lengths we go to for love, as well as an exploration across culture and history into how we learn languages—and what they say about who we are.
Collins grapples with the complexities of the French language, enduring excruciating role-playing games with her classmates at a Swiss language school and accidently telling her mother-in-law that she’s given birth to a coffee machine.
In learning French, Collins must wrestle with the very nature of French identity and society—which, it turns out, is a far cry from life back home in North Carolina. Plumbing the mysterious depths of humanity’s many forms of language, Collins describes with great style and wicked humor the frustrations, embarrassments, surprises, and, finally, joys of learning—and living in—French. (From the publisher.)
Author Bio
• Birth—ca. 1979-80
• Raised—Wilmington, North Carolina, USA
• Education—B.A., Princeton University
• Currently—lives in Paris, France
Lauren Collins is a writer for The New Yorker, whose memoir, When in French: Love in a Second Language was published in 2016.
Collins was raised in Wilmington, North Carolina. Her mother grew up outside of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, and her father, a lawyer, was raised on New York's Long Island. The two met at Duke University, then settled in Wilmington. As a child, Collins traveled frequently to visit family in New York, becoming familiar with the city and prompting a move to Manhattan during and after college.
Collin majored in English at Princeton University, and in the summer after her junior year, she interned for Legal Aid in New York City, where she gathered evidence as an investigator. She came to the realization that what she cared about were not the legal aspects of the job but the personal stories she obtained while interviewing people. That interest led her to consider journalism.
Following graduation, and a short stint as an editorial assistant at Vogue, she landed a job in 2003 at The New Yorker. After a time she became a staff writer.
Eventually Collins moved to London, where she met her French-speaking husband, Oliver. From there the couple moved to Geneva, Switzerland, and finally, to Paris, where they now live.
The subject of Collins's memoir is her struggle to learn French in order to communicate with her husband on a deeper level. She also feared becoming "a Borat of a mother," unable to understand her own children. What ensues is a funny story about the lengths we go to for love. She breaks from personal journey to share historical knowledge and linguistics and the history of language.
Book Reviews
An exceptionally insightful meditation on how language informs culture and personality. It's a lovely read that gets better the more you sit with it.
Jason Zinoman - New York Times
A thoughtful, beautifully written meditation on the art of language and intimacy. The book unfolds like several books in one: on moving abroad, on communication in human relationships, on the history of language, and in the end, on the delights of cross-cultural fusion.
Suzy Hansen - New York Times Book Review
[An] engaging and surprisingly meaty memoir…. When in French ranges from the humorously personal to a deeper look at various theories of language acquisition and linguistics….There’s far more to Collins’ book than screwball comedy, and those who have weathered linguistic crossings themselves are apt to find particular resonance in its substantive inquiry into language, identity, and transcultural translation.
NPR.org
In her emotional, erudite memoir…[Collins] documents her linguistic labors, including the missteps–she accidentally tells her mother-in-law she gave birth to a coffeemaker–on the road to mastery. At times she expounds on the history and philosophy of language; at others, it feels like catching up with a clever friend you haven’t seen since college. But the most intriguing question posed is as much about identity as language: Are you someone else when you speak and live in a non-native tongue?
Time
A memoir of the New Yorker writer's experience falling in love with a French banker and winding up in Geneva, recounted in [Collins's] distinctive and deeply intelligent mix of insight and humor.
Thomas Chatterton Williams - Nation
We can't all fall in love with a dashing Frenchman and move to France, but that's what Lauren Collins found herself doing when she met Olivier. This delightful memoir explores the New Yorker staff writer's experience learning the French language—and the culture and people besides.
Elle.com
This smart memoir by New Yorker writer Collins is an extended essay on how the languages we speak shape who we are.... The transitions can be clunky as Collins shifts between story telling and embarking on academic discussions, but her writing is often elegant and exact.
Publishers Weekly
[A] wry memoir…[Collins] unearths other tidbits of trivia and history that will fascinate lovers of words and language…The heart of the book lies in Collins' personal story, which she tells with humor, humility and a deep affection for the people and cultures involved.
BookPage
As Collins gradually decided to commit to learning French because Olivier seemed worth the effort, she breaks from the personal narrative to share scholarly knowledge with lay readers.... Throughout, the author ably weaves together the personal and the historical. A memoir filled with pleasing passages in every chapter.
Kirkus Reviews
Discussion Questions
We'll add publisher questions if and when they're available; in the meantime, use these LitLovers talking points to start a discusison for When In French...then take off on your own:
1. Start with your own attempts to learn a foreign language. How difficult—or easy—was it for you? What level of facility have you ever achieved in a foreign language? Have any of your experiences match those of Lauren Colllins?
2. Talk about the reasons the author decided to take the plunge and learn French.
3. How is the word "love" used differently in America and French? What else did you find surprising about the differences between English, particularly American English, and French?
4. Aside from language, what other differences existed between Lauren and Oliver—particularly in terms of belief systems, professions, or even the way in which their minds worked?
5. Oliver told Lauren that speaking to her in English was like touching her with gloves. What did her mean, specifically?
6. (Follow-up to Question 5): Collins writes of her relationship with Oliver:
We didn’t possess that easy shorthand, encoding all manner of attitudes and assumptions, by which some people seem able, nearly telepathically, to make themselves mutually known.
Is it perhaps impossible to ever achieve lasting intimacy while spanning two languages? Is language difference an insurmountable barrier in a long-lasting relationship?
7. Collins provides historical insights into the problems caused by language barriers. Locate specific examples to talk about—in international realtions or simply everyday life. What problems have you faced in your personal life. During your travels, perhaps? On the job?
8. What do you think of Collins's assertion that...
It is unhealthy for the global community to rely too heavily on one language as it is to mass-cultivate a single crop.
Do you agree? Are you old enough recall Esperanto—the vision of a single world language? If you're not familiar with the movement, Google the term and talk about what you find.
9. What does the author have to say about Americans' seeming aversion to foreign languages? Do you agree with her?
10. What did you find funny in Collins's struggle to learn French? The birth of Lauren's coffee machine—there is that! What else made you laugh?
11. What knowledge have you gained about language you didn't have before you read When in French? Prior to reading Collins's memoir, did you have any background in linguistics, grammar, or language history?
(Questions by LitLovers. Please feel free to use them, online or off, with attribution. Thanks.)